~rapxic

i've realized now what has been keeping me so backward that i was even afraid to practice and fail , its fear, something that lived with me for years and was installed in my nature from the time i could see . i thought it was stress , lol i had already overcome this fear but somehow it showered back on me , making me so shallow that i couldn't even remember the good times i had ,making me think all i ever done was just hopeless and to to this alot of people quickly saw that weakness and continually tried to bring me down , thats when my darkside stepped in.

that side of me showed alot of hate but also channelled alot of courage when needed , it made me feel strong but also destroyed alot of the things i used to do good , it rebelled and it rebelled over and over just to make me realize that i was not weakened , that i did not go through such tough roads to just give it up all away and that denying myself to make others feel welcomed would make the sun shine all day.

i've come to realize that i am not one of those who just sit and think theyrelife is nothing and that i am not my father , i am the opposite of weak, i am not a used to be , i am the competition

i am a fear